Heart or Wealth: Navigating Love in the Lush Landscape of Affluence

You’ve probably found yourself gazing at a lifestyle that appears beyond your grasp. It’s an opulent panorama of wealth and luxury where money seems abundant. They enjoy their chic car while yours sputters to life on a good day. Their home echoes comfort and affluence while you share a rental with roommates. The discrepancy is staggering; they dwell in prosperity while your journey is modest.

And here’s the twist—they are fond of you. A few dates in, and you have savored a sliver of their world, a world that tantalizes and thrills you. And as you bask in the joy, the question begins to loom, “Are they ‘the one?'”

However, a nagging doubt tugs at your heartstrings: Are you falling for the person or the glittering promise of their wealth? Your unease stems from your biblical wisdom, knowing that “For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs” (1 Timothy 6:10). You dread the idea of this verse framing your relationships, present or future.

As you explore the depths of this relationship, consider the following perspectives:


The American love affair with debt is widely recognized. Data from NerdWallet reveals that the average credit card debt among Americans exceeds $15,000. Households with car loans carry an average debt exceeding $27,000. The implication? Many are living a lifestyle they can’t afford, staging an enticing façade that’s destined to crumble.


Caution is your ally here. It’s easy to get swept up in the charm of experiences, to relish the luxurious lifestyle, overlooking the essence of your partner. The focus inadvertently shifts to the material riches rather than the individual, making you overlook their character flaws. However, no amount of money can forever hide these shortcomings; they will eventually surface.


You’ve likely seen affluent yet discontented married couples. Despite their wealth, they seem devoid of joy, displaying scant delight in their spouse. Money alone is a feeble provider of fulfillment.

So, how do you navigate the sea of wealth to ensure you’re falling for the person, not their affluence? Consider money as a mirror of their heart.

The Bible is rich in verses about money and possessions, tallying over 2,000. Jesus spoke more about money than any other topic during His time on Earth. Why such emphasis? Money reflects the heart. It offers insights into a person’s character and values.


A person’s speech often mirrors their thoughts. So, listen to their financial discussions. Does money seem to be an ultimate goal or a means to a higher purpose? God crafted us to be channels of His generosity, not mere hoarders. Do their talks about money reflect generosity, community impact, or advancing God’s Kingdom? Listen attentively.


While words hold significance, actions speak volumes. Look closely at their activities. Are they self-centered or focused on others? Do God’s matters take priority, or are they relegated to the sidelines? Are they generous with their time and resources, or do they clutch them tightly? Observations matter.


You’re often a reflection of your closest companions. Whom we associate with influences our character. Do their friends encourage spiritual growth, or do they seem to veer from it? The habits, conversations, and actions of their group can reveal aspects about your partner that you might have overlooked.

Money isn’t inherently evil, and there’s no fault in pursuing a relationship with someone wealthy. However, be wary. Apparent wealth could be a façade, and the discovery tells you more about the individual. Remember, wealth can shroud character defects. Don’t be lured by the experiences wealth affords more than the person you share them with. Material experiences can be exhilarating, but they won’t guarantee enduring personal or relational fulfillment.

Strive to see beyond the wealth, seeking the heart of the one you wish to know more deeply.