Why “God Told Me” Can Be Misleading

Spend enough time in Christian circles and you’re bound to hear it “God told me.” It could be someone announcing their new job, their next move, or even their romantic decision punctuated with confidence that it was God’s voice that led them there.

But as familiar as the phrase has become, so too is the uneasiness it can leave in its wake. Did God really say that? How do they know? Should we question it or would that mean questioning God?

The phrase “God told me” carries spiritual weight. But if we’re not careful, it can also carry a dangerous sense of finality, cutting off conversation, community, and accountability. It’s time we ask not just if God speaks, but how we talk about it when He does.

The Pressure to Be Sure

For many believers, declaring “God told me” is less about confidence and more about fear. We long to make wise decisions, to hear God’s voice, and to silence our doubts. When circumstances are unclear, relationships are messy, and emotions are high, saying “God told me” can feel like the strongest possible defense against uncertainty.

It becomes our way of saying, “This is why I’m doing this. Please don’t question me.”

But in doing so, we sometimes create a relational barrier not just with skeptics, but with fellow believers. By presenting our direction as divinely sealed, we discourage conversation. We make others feel they can't ask questions without offending God Himself.

That’s not spiritual discernment. That’s spiritual shutdown.

It Can Misrepresent God

Claiming divine backing for our decisions especially when they’re controversial or unclear can put God’s name on our own desires. If later we change our minds or realize we acted in haste, what does that say about the God we claimed spoke?

To an outsider, it might look like God is indecisive. To a struggling believer, it might seem like He’s misleading. To ourselves, it can feel like failure. And when God gets blamed for our every whim, His voice starts to lose meaning.

Of course, God does speak. But He never asks us to wield His voice like a badge of infallibility. Instead, He invites us into a posture of humility, listening, and growth.

Discerning Without Declaring

So what do we do with those moments of deep inner stirring the convictions we think come from the Lord? How do we speak about them honestly, without overstating?

Here are some helpful shifts in language and posture that honor both God and community.

1. Preface with “I Feel”

If Scripture isn’t explicit on your situation, don’t pretend it is. Say things like, “I feel like the Lord is leading me…” or “I sense that this may be where God is guiding me…”

It’s not weak to admit uncertainty. It’s mature.

By acknowledging that you may not be 100% right, you keep the door open for others to speak into your life and for God to redirect you if needed.

2. Ask for Continued Prayer

Even if you’re mostly convinced of God’s leading, stay open. Try saying, “I believe this is where God is directing me, but I’d love your prayers as I continue to seek His will.”

Inviting prayer communicates that you're still listening, still discerning, still humble before God.

3. Recognize It’s Only a Glimpse

God may be showing you one step not the whole staircase. Often, our sense of direction is a glimpse, not a guarantee. Remember how Paul describes our spiritual knowledge: “Now we see in a mirror dimly…” (1 Corinthians 13:12).

You might be right. But you might also be seeing just one pixel of the picture.

4. Practice Prayer, Not Just Planning

Sometimes we confuse our thoughts about God’s will with real-time communion with God.

Discernment doesn't come from logical deduction alone. Prayer is more than listing pros and cons. It's sitting before the Lord, being still, listening, repenting, worshiping.

If we want to be led by the Spirit, we must first learn how to be still before Him.

5. Involve Others

God didn’t design us to make life’s biggest decisions alone. Proverbs 11:14 reminds us that “in an abundance of counselors there is safety.”

Ask your church leaders. Talk to wise friends. Don’t just seek agreement seek truth. Let your community be part of your discernment, not just your audience after the fact.

You don’t need to impress anyone with spiritual certainty. You need people who love you enough to say, “Have you considered this?” or “Let’s pray through that together.”

Toward a Better Conversation

Let’s be clear the problem isn’t that people say “God told me.” The problem is when we use the phrase to end conversations instead of start them to shield ourselves from challenge instead of inviting others into our process.

If you believe God is leading you somewhere, that’s worth sharing. But share it with vulnerability. Speak with the weight such a claim deserves. Be open to the possibility that you’re still learning and that God may have more to say, even through the people around you.

God’s direction is real. His voice is alive. But it’s also rarely thunderous or final in the moment. More often, it’s revealed step by step, through prayer, Scripture, wise counsel, and a listening heart.

So next time you feel led by the Spirit, don’t just declare it. Discern it together. And walk forward with reverence, humility, and a heart ready to be corrected.

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