Happy to Embrace God's Design for Women

Growing up, I had never heard the term "complementarian." It wasn’t until I became a young married woman that I encountered the concept, but I soon realized it had always been evident in my upbringing and in Scripture. Complementarity the idea that men and women are distinct but equal in value, with different roles and purposes had been woven throughout my experiences and Biblical stories like those of Adam and Eve, Sarah and Abraham, Ruth and Boaz. These examples reflect a divine order where men lead and protect, and women support and nurture in unique, God-ordained ways.

In today’s culture, the word "equality" is a banner under which many march, often in ways that obscure God’s created distinctions between men and women. However, embracing complementarity isn’t about diminishing women’s worth. On the contrary, Scripture shows that both men and women are equally precious in God’s eyes, yet they are created for different roles. This truth, when accepted, frees us from the world’s pressure to be interchangeable with men, instead allowing us to celebrate the beauty of being created distinctly as women.

The Bible teaches that a husband is the head of his wife, just as Christ is the head of the Church. This does not mean domination, but sacrificial love on the husband’s part and willing submission from the wife. Ephesians 5:22–33 lays out this dynamic, where men are called to love their wives deeply, and women are called to respect their husbands. Far from oppressive, this design reflects the love story of Christ and His bride, the Church. In living out these roles, we reflect the gospel itself.

It wasn’t always easy for me to fully accept these ideas. Like many, I was raised with the notion that equality should mean sameness, and I wrestled with the cultural push for egalitarianism, which suggests that men and women are identical in their roles and functions. But as I grew in my understanding of God’s Word, I saw the joy and peace that comes from embracing His design for me as a woman. What a gift it is to be uniquely feminine, to have a woman’s mind, body, and instincts!

Two books played a pivotal role in my journey: The Quest for Meekness and Quietness of Spirit by Matthew Henry and How to Be Free from Bitterness by Jim Wilson. These books, though not specifically about gender roles, guided me in cultivating a heart that trusts and submits to God’s will. They helped me replace the bitterness and restlessness of striving for control with a spirit of peace and gratitude. I encourage you to explore them, as they offer valuable insights into Christian obedience and submission.

In our world, it’s counter-cultural to affirm the Biblical roles of men and women. But agreeing with God’s design brings an internal freedom and joy that transcends societal trends. To acknowledge and live out the truth that men and women have distinct, complementary roles is to reflect God’s good and perfect order. It’s an act of worship and trust in Him.

True joy comes not from seeking to be something we are not, but from wholeheartedly embracing who God has created us to be. For me, that means rejoicing in the gift of being a woman a unique, cherished, and purposeful creation of God. Living this truth brings peace now and promises greater joy in eternity.

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