The Christian Phrase We’ve Misunderstood

“God told me.” If you’ve spent much time in church circles, chances are you’ve heard those words spoken with certainty perhaps even by someone you deeply respect. You might have even said them yourself. “God told me to take this job.” “God told me to break off this relationship.” “God told me to move.”

And while the intent behind such statements may be sincere, the impact is often problematic. In our desire to be faithful and obedient, we may actually be building walls where we should be opening doors both with fellow believers and those still exploring faith. In fact, using “God told me” as an all-purpose explanation for our life choices may be one of the most misused phrases in modern Christianity.

The Weight of “God Told Me”

When someone says, “God told me,” they’re not just making a statement they’re ending a conversation. It implies infallibility. After all, who wants to argue with God?

The problem is, we are fallible. We often confuse emotion, intuition, and desire with divine direction. When we declare our personal decision as God’s direct command, we may actually shut down wise counsel, healthy community, and spiritual accountability.

And worse, if we later realize we were mistaken, we’ve not only misrepresented our own judgment we’ve misrepresented God. Suddenly, it’s not just a change of heart it’s a divine reversal. And for those watching our lives (especially skeptics or seekers), it can make God appear inconsistent, confusing, or even manipulative.

That’s why it’s essential we learn how to discern God’s leading without claiming a level of certainty we haven’t actually received.

Yes, God Still Speaks

Before going further, let’s be clear: God absolutely still speaks. He speaks through His Word, through His Spirit, through godly counsel, through prayer, through circumstances. We are not deists God is not silent. But the Bible also shows us that God's voice is often gentle, mysterious, and humbling.

Very few biblical figures heard from God audibly. Most discerned His will through faithful obedience over time, not instant clarity. Even Paul, one of the most Spirit-led men in history, speaks in Acts 16 of trying to go one direction before being “prevented” and redirected by the Spirit. That doesn’t sound like someone who had every step mapped out.

So how should we talk about God’s leading in a way that’s faithful, humble, and honest?

Five Better Ways to Talk About God’s Direction

1. Say “I feel led,” not “God told me”

This small change carries a big shift in tone. Instead of presenting your choice as a divine command, it opens the door for feedback, prayer, and conversation. It invites community instead of shutting it out.

“I feel led to take this job” allows for dialogue. “God told me to take this job” doesn’t.

2. Acknowledge your need for ongoing guidance

Even if you feel confident in a particular decision, let others know you’re still listening. Say, “I sense God may be leading me this way, but I’d really value prayer and discernment.” That communicates humility and trust in God’s continued involvement in your journey.

3. Remember that our perspective is always partial

No matter how clearly you think you’ve heard from God, you’ve only seen a glimpse. As Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 13:12, “Now we see in a mirror dimly.”

God’s ways are higher than ours. That means every direction He gives comes with more layers than we could possibly perceive. Treat your clarity as a starting point, not the final word.

4. Practice actual prayer, not just overthinking

Sometimes we say we’ve “prayed about it” when really we’ve just worried about it a lot. We’ve made pros-and-cons lists, consulted a few verses, and made a gut decision. That’s not prayer.

Prayer involves listening, not just talking. It involves quiet, not just strategy. Prayer reminds us that God’s peace is the confirmation we need most (Philippians 4:6–7).

5. Lean on the wisdom of community

Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” The Holy Spirit doesn’t only live inside you. God speaks through others especially those steeped in Scripture and grounded in love.

If you’re unsure about a decision, bring it to trusted believers and invite honest feedback. Ask them to challenge you if needed. Spiritual maturity includes the ability to say, “I may be wrong.”

Humility Honors God

Ultimately, humility is the posture God blesses. Not arrogance masked as spiritual boldness, but true humility the kind that says:

• “I believe God is leading me here, but I’m still listening.”

• “I feel called in this direction, but I know I need others to walk with me.”

• “I want to do God’s will, and I’m open to correction along the way.”

This kind of language fosters connection, not division. It keeps us tethered to the body of Christ instead of placing ourselves above it. It also models a faith that is alive, relational, and honest qualities that are deeply attractive in a world suspicious of religious certainty.

God’s Will Isn’t Fragile

One of the reasons we feel pressure to speak in absolutes is because we’re afraid. We think that if we don’t have certainty, we might mess up God’s plan. But here’s the truth: God’s will isn’t fragile. He’s not pacing the heavens hoping we guess right.

Psalm 37:23 says, “The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when he delights in his way.” That means God is with you even in the uncertainty. You can trust Him to redirect, refine, and reveal as you go.

So take the pressure off. Let go of the need to declare “God told me.” Instead, live a life that shows you’re listening and that you trust God enough to keep listening, even after the first step.

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