Have We Mistaken Spiritual Growth for Self-Improvement?

You’ve got the journaling Bible with pastel tabs. The devotional app. The lo-fi Proverbs remix for your morning playlist. Maybe you’re even tracking your spiritual habits in a color-coded planner nestled neatly between “hydrate” and “read Atomic Habits.”

In short, you’re crushing spiritual growth.

Or are you?

Because for many of us, what began as a pursuit of holiness has subtly morphed into a performance. We’ve confused spiritual formation with self-optimization, and sanctification with personal branding. The vibe has shifted from “pick up your cross” to “optimize your quiet time.”

And the consequences are real.

A recent Barna study revealed that while over 70% of churchgoers claim their faith is “very important,” only 1 in 5 say they’re actually growing. Among young adults, record levels of spiritual burnout are being reported. We’re exhausted. Disillusioned. But at least our prayer journals look good on Instagram.

From Hustle to Holiness

Dr. Alicia Britt Chole, author of Anonymous Jesus’ Hidden Years and Yours, put it simply: “We live in an achievement-obsessed culture. And we’ve imported that mindset into our discipleship. We want instant fruit and Instagrammable faith.”

We want transformation with the timeline of Amazon Prime.

But real spiritual growth doesn’t work that way. It’s not a checklist. It’s not a vibe. And it certainly doesn’t come with a content strategy.

In Galatians 5, Paul describes the fruit of the Spirit love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control not as traits we force, but as outcomes of abiding in Christ. You can’t hustle your way into gentleness. You can’t productivity-hack your way into patience.

Fruit grows slowly. Quietly. Often underground.

That’s not the kind of process that plays well in a highlight reel. But it’s the process Jesus described.

Self-Help vs. Spiritual Formation

Self-help asks, “How do I get better?” Spiritual growth asks, “How do I become more like Christ?”

One centers on your performance. The other demands surrender.

Pastor Rich Villodas captured the difference well. “The first asks how I can climb the ladder. The second asks how I can pick up my cross.”

And here’s the kicker picking up your cross will never go viral. It doesn’t come with motivational quotes or aesthetic lighting. It’s quiet. Costly. And deeply countercultural.

There’s nothing wrong with reading personal development books, doing breathwork, or listening to Christian podcasts. But those things aren’t spiritual growth unless they actually draw us closer to Jesus not just to a more polished version of ourselves.

Real growth isn’t about being more productive or more put-together. It’s about being more like Christ.

Signs of Real Growth

So what does authentic spiritual formation look like? It’s probably slower and less photogenic than we think.

• Read slower. Not to finish, but to be formed. Sometimes meditating on a single Psalm for a week will do more than blazing through a 90-day reading plan.

• Be still. Not just breathwork. Be still before God. Sit in silence without curating it.

• Get uncomfortable. Ask the Holy Spirit where you’re performing instead of abiding. Then listen.

• Find people. Spiritual growth doesn’t happen in isolation or online. It happens in living rooms, over meals, in awkward vulnerability, in church.

Jesus never called us to optimize our lives. He called us to lose them (Luke 9:24). That doesn’t look impressive. But it leads to something far better than performance: it leads to peace.

In John 15, Jesus says, “I am the vine; you are the branches … apart from me you can do nothing.” That’s not a motivational slogan it’s a reality check. You can build a beautiful spiritual aesthetic and still be disconnected from Christ.

Abiding doesn’t mean feeling spiritually “on.” It means staying close to Him. Depending on Him. Trusting that even the pruning has purpose.

Beyond the Feed

Let’s be honest: most of us are tempted to curate our faith as much as we do our photos. But sanctification doesn’t fit a filter. It’s messy. Slow. Sacred.

So maybe it’s time to stop editing our spiritual lives to look impressive. To stop measuring our growth by how inspired we feel. To stop looking for fruit on trees we haven’t watered.

Spiritual formation is not a sprint. It’s a life lived in step with Jesus quietly, daily, sometimes painfully, but always anchored in grace.

And in a world that runs on hustle, the quiet faithfulness of true discipleship may be the loudest witness we can offer.

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