When Success Isn’t Enough The Making of a Godly Husband

From the outside, Nabal had everything. He was rich, powerful, married to a wise and beautiful woman, and lived in comfort. If he were your neighbor, you'd probably admire his home, envy his cars, and maybe even wonder how he managed to marry so well. His life looked like a success story.

But Scripture tells a very different tale. In God’s eyes, Nabal was a fool worthless, reckless, and spiritually bankrupt. The contrast between his image and his reality is a warning for every man, and especially for every husband.

When Strength Becomes Harshness

Nabal wasn’t a weak man. He worked hard and led a booming business. But he used his strength to intimidate, not to protect. First Samuel 25:3 describes him as “harsh and badly behaved.” It’s a sad indictment, especially when contrasted with his wife Abigail, who is called “discerning and beautiful.”

Strength is not the problem. Godly men are strong mentally, spiritually, emotionally but their strength is marked by tenderness. A man’s home should be a place of refuge, not fear. His children and wife should feel safest with him, not in spite of him.

When Courage Lacks Wisdom

Nabal had no fear. When David, the Lord’s anointed and a military commander, humbly asked for food, Nabal insulted him and sent him away empty-handed. It was a bold move and a foolish one. Courage without wisdom is reckless pride.

Christian men are called to be courageous, but not careless. Biblical courage comes from knowing God is with us (Isaiah 41:10). It doesn't mean starting fights to prove our strength; it means standing firm where God tells us to and trusting Him with the outcome.

When Wealth Isn’t Generosity

Nabal wasn’t just rich he was “very rich” (1 Samuel 25:2). But his wealth made him tightfisted, not generous. He refused to help David’s men, even though they had protected his workers. He hoarded what he had, thinking only of himself.

Jesus warned of this mindset in Luke 12. A man builds bigger barns to store more for himself, only to be called a fool by God. “So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God” (Luke 12:21). Godly men use what they have however much or little for the good of others and the glory of God.

When Success Lacks Gratitude

By every worldly measure, Nabal was a success. But he gave no thanks to God. He said, “Shall I take my bread and my water and my meat…?” (1 Samuel 25:11). Not a word of gratitude to the God who gave him everything. He believed his success was his own doing.

Psalm 24:1 reminds us, “The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof.” Christian men understand their career wins, financial gains, and daily bread all come from the Lord. Gratitude is not optional it’s essential.

When Hunger Controls a Man

Perhaps the clearest picture of Nabal’s heart comes in 1 Samuel 25:36: “He was holding a feast in his house, like the feast of a king… for he was very drunk.” With danger outside his door, he chose drunkenness over duty. He escaped into pleasure instead of standing firm in faith.

Scripture commands self-control as a defining trait of mature men (Titus 2:2, 6). That doesn’t mean a life without joy it means joy that’s rooted in Christ, not in indulgence. The pleasures of this world are fleeting. The joy of the Lord is forever.

A Mirror for Husbands

Nabal’s failures offer a cautionary mirror for Christian husbands. We are stewards, not owners, of what God has entrusted to us our strength, our resources, our influence, our wives and children. And God sees how we treat them.

Do we hoard what we’ve been given or give freely? Do we lash out or lead with love? Do we make time for family or only for work? Do we welcome God’s presence into our daily lives, or shut Him out once Sunday ends?

Ultimately, every man will be measured by how he responds to God’s anointed. Nabal rejected David, the anointed king of Israel, and paid dearly. We now live in the time of a greater King Jesus Christ, the Son of God. He has come to our doorstep. How will we receive Him?

It’s not enough to say we believe. Our actions how we lead, love, serve, and sacrifice reveal whether we truly follow Him. A good husband isn’t defined by his paycheck, his status, or his house. He’s defined by how he treats Jesus every day, in every choice, and in how he loves those closest to him.

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